------------------------------------------------------- rant of the day: i'm back.. -------------------------------------------------------
finally back at sg.. at the airport, i feel so sad yet so glad.. its a very stupid feeling.. you dunno whether to smile or frown~ you feel your tears yet it won't flow.. so ya, if you were to ask me if i'm happy to be back, my answer is not neccessary.. no doubt i can see people whom i've missed for the pass 8 months but now i'm missing people whom ive lived with for the pass 8 months.. so its both sad and happy for me..
and ls, somethings are really, like what you said, too little too late.. we just didn't open up to each other more from the beginning.. i'm just glad things are fine tuned before i return :) and you'll really be missed too..
ok nuff said bout my brunei stuffs.. speaking of which, i think i'm going to blog about the things i'll miss in brunei WITH PICTURES!!! ok no big deal :P
sunday was celebrating baby's birthday.. gave her a surprise :) insider story~ and its long so shan't elaborate haha bought her nintendo ds lite and hope she likes it.. we ate at parkroyal hotel (near mustafa) their buffet was good but kinda expensive.. roughly $40 per head.. whooosh but still its not bad.. oh and lunch i had tepanyaki buffet (again) at goodwood park hotel.. food as good as usual~ but the place has become smaller.. much much smaller.. and its $40 per head also.. haha
basically thats about it.. went to watch golden compass yesterday with baby.. and it sucks.. 1.5 dots out of 5.. boring movie.. the only nice thing is it has cute animals :P should have watched enchanted.. haha
------------------------------------------------------- rant of the day: i'm so disappointed!! of all people in this small camp, you have to be the one who least understands me when i thought you would.. you have to be the one who makes me feel like as if i'm being a bastard for the things i did.. and i thought i could trust you if i need someone to talk to.. guess i'm hoping too much from you.. -------------------------------------------------------
received news that i would most probably be back during the 1st week of dec..
yes its MOST PROBABLY.. so leave ur hopes as low as you could to prevent disappointment :)
zul left yesterday.. i was in moving beds when he left.. and went to toilet washed up and held back some tears.. afterall he is one of my closest and trusted one in brunei (other then the old batch of armour boys).. i will miss him greatly and no i don't show my emotions.. i always try to hold back, unless that particular emotion is anger.. haha anyways i do wish him all the best while he's in sg..
somehow i've acheived most of th things i planned to before i came to brunei.. so guess its high time for me to leave.. and guess its the best for most people.. guess its better without me nagging haha
definitely will miss the place and people here and erm.. lets hope the rest of my days are happy ones :)
------------------------------------------------------- rant of the day: i'm indeed touched.. -------------------------------------------------------
HAPPY 21st birthday to myself!!!!!! yes i'm 21 years old.. and of legal age to make major decisions, like watching a R21 show!!! ok.. no funny.. anyway~ recieved well wishes from.. ya la the usual peeps who have 'xin' :P
got prezzie from wei rui and cami.. they bought me a nike gym glove.. then jun hong and phillip gave me a yonex polo tee.. and erm.. on 19th they had a mini happy hour.. cut cakes and sang karaoke.. too bad i can't stay for long.. cause of regimental duty :(
and erm.. i got a shock of my life this morning when i received something from wei rui.. its the only thing i could relate closely back home right now.. and i'm really touched by wad was planned.. shan't elaborate since its something personal i guess..
baby, i love you and thats a fact that wouldn't change.. even in years to come i believe..
oh and erm.. recently received news that i most probably will be back on the 1st week of dec.. so watch out.. :P
------------------------------------------------------- rant of the day: what's next?? -------------------------------------------------------
somehow, its not easy trying hard to communicate and deal with people that u rarely have to do so.. for my case its the elite JC students~ its not like i can't talk to them at all but i just felt stupid a few weeks back.. we're having a conversation about kids meal.. or something~ and i made a passing comment that i can try for that kids offer (jokingly and obviously i can't) and one of them said 'u can if the go by intelligence'
i dunno why i did not flare up.. its not typical me to get insulted like that and yet not do anything about it.. i guess i've probably toned down??? or not??? well, guess sometimes i can't be bothered with their ignorant comments.. i do not know if it was intentional or not but thinking back, it did hurt~ well i guess i'm not popular among elite JC students?? heck.. it doesn't matter at all.. not anymore~ i've decided to be myself in future and thats it.. like it or not, its none of my fu*king business.. i've had enough of stubborn smart alec~ btw i'm saying this in general cause i do not wan to pin point anyone.. and i know this post till now is very contradictory to wad my title suggest but yes, i'm really feeling good.. this kind of stuffs always fail to bother me~ :) and i just need to express myself a little..
back to feeling good.. well well, feeling good cause i've been hitting the gym and result is coming out slowly.. and i feel good even though my body aches everyday.. at least now i dun feel as lethargic.. and also feeling good cause my mum bought a digi cam for the family :P and there's new bed in my room.. and now i sense the air con is reviving whahahaha i'm so looking forward to going back~ so yeah, i'm feeling very very very good right now :D and erm.. i'm 73 kg now :D glad that i'm progressing whahaha
*btw happy belated 20th birtday to dave bogay :P din manage to get net access till today so here goes and may ur dreams come true :D
------------------------------------------------------- rant of the day: i am damn shagged out!!!! -------------------------------------------------------
ever tried so hard for ur ippt that u feel like ripping off your legs??
ever pulled 9 chin-ups and missed the gold standard by 1??
ever jumped SBJ at 230 and missed the gold mark by 4 cm???
ever did 37 sit-ups and missed the ippt gold by 1??
ever ran 10.2 secs and didn't manage to take 1 step faster to get the gold timing of 10.1 secs?
ever ran 9.45 mins for 2.4 km and missed the ippt gold timing by 1 sec???
ever trained so hard for 2 months or more and you know you've trained hard and well but when it comes to ippt day, you fumbled, stumbled, crumpled and cocked up every single station just by that small little bit???
ever had this feeling before?? ever felt like as though heaven is unfair?? ever felt that the station IC's didn't favour you?? ever felt like crushing your arms and legs just because you missed the mark, ippt gold mark, silver mark or even just the passing mark, by that bit???
i had acquantaince with this feeling before, something very similar.. just that i make everything but just the chin up.. and just because of that, i didn't manage to make it at command school.. but now, i'm proud, i repeat.. PROUD not arrogant, that i finally made it to ippt gold.. efforts for the past few months suddenly seem to worth it.. and another thing is.. i've clocked 200 km in about a month.. thats double joy for myself.. as for those who missed gold just by that bit and know that you've put in a lot of effort for training, dun despair.. next month's ippt would be your chance again.. and nothing is impossible.. cause even i could do it~!!! and until now i still can't really believe that fact.. yours truly is FINALLY a GOLD medallist!!!!!!
below's the result: Chin ups - 15 Sit-ups - 40 SBJ - 239 cm Shuttle run - 10.02 secs 2.4km run - 9 mins 23 secs
and erm.. will be $200 richer in my bank soon.. whahahahahahhaaha
------------------------------------------------------- rant of the day: when the shorty is not around, there is sun shine.. -------------------------------------------------------
guess wad?? i just clocked 100 km of running within 2 weeks.. whahahaha so happy.. and i'm the 1st few to clock it in this camp.. anyway, that's beside the point.. now i'm going for my 2nd 100km to make it a grand total of 200 km.. lets hope i could do it by the end of august?? hmmmmm i'm kind of like running 10 km everytime so i guess it should be reasonable to complete that by the end of this month..
hmmmm btw, my officer is giving the stress to me le.. he wants me to get ippt gold by sept.. haix.. 2 of the new guys here got gold liao.. and sir seems to have high hopes on me getting it.. but my confidence level isn't really high.. in fact, everyone around me have high hopes of me getting ippt gold.. haix.. feeling real stress here.. my SBJ just can't seem to jump far.. running should be on track right now.. as for the rest, i should be on the 5 point standard.. now i'm just hoping that my knee doesn't die on me before my ippt next month.. its hurting more and more due to basketball last time.. and i think i strained it further while clocking my mileage.. haix.. lets hope i can get gold too.. its gonna be a good feeling wearing the ippt gold badge on ur left arm.. plus there's incentive as well hehe~ $200 extra in my bank is a good idea too whahaha
i've decided to learn driving as well.. starting next month.. not sure if i could convert or not but heck.. at least get the experience.. learning how to drive can't be bad anyway~ so no harm.. and its only freaking $500+++ haha
*edited* i've forgotten to blog on some of my emotional state.. so there goes.. ahaha
somehow, i feel i should shut up~ cause its like i'm one of the more "kpkb kia" here and i believe some new guys wouldn't like my style.. they dun know when i'm joking.. they can't take sarcasm jokes.. they simply take things in a way tooo serious manner.. its like sometimes i'm jokingly suanning them but they just took it so seriously and it sparks off a quarrel for no apparent reason.. all just because they don't understand me and i don't understand them either.. i think this is because most of them are jc students (with excellent result, like really good) and i simply can't communicate with them in their manner.. neither could they do it in my manner.. it seems that they have their ego and pride and i have mine and they can't take straight forwardness.. i just so happen to be the very straight forward kind.. and its not that i dun say things without going thru my head.. its just that i hope for the best out of everyone here and i hope everyone works hard.. and definitely i teach whatever i know to them too but i dun think they understand that.. so ya.. guess i shall just shut up and let them do it their style.. afterall, their the majorities here and they're gonna be the one staying here longer.. it doesn't really matter to me whether in the end, i'm gonna be part of them or not.. cause i believe that only probably a few of them are gonna be real friends that i would keep.. as for the rest whom i couldn't communicate, no point in me wanting the best of them.. cause in the end, it doesn't matter.. i may sound kind of stone hearted here but hey, thats the fact of life and i dun wish to put on a mask too often.. so ya~ there goes..
shall end here le.. still have around 3 more months before i can go back sg.. i know you peeps are missing me back there right :X haha will be back really soon so wait for me~
------------------------------------------------------- rant of the day: ippt gold is just a few steps away... -------------------------------------------------------
i've successfully cut my weight to 76kg.. hmmm not bad eh?? and now i'm working towards ippt gold.. lets hope i could do it..
life here has been pretty bored.. but had bbq last friday.. and we ate lots of good food~ sting ray, prawns, sotong, chicken fillet, beef, choco fondue and lots of lots of *ahem* drinks *ahem*.. din expect to be able to drink here :D but had lots of fun singing in function hall and drinking~
i'm in a dilemma whether to take driving here or not.. cause the rule for us to convert is not very clear.. not sure if its total stay of 6 months or after getting license must stay for 6 months.. hmmmm anyway shall end here~